Reaching out make a connection is where all the excitement is…and the fear. That moment when we open ourselves to the potential of rejection is also the most thrilling. When we speak of the power of Mary Magdalene’s vulnerability, that quality which brought forth from her beloved Yeshua his capacity to be tender, we are speaking of a Divine love-play and an eternal dance.

I wrote in my previous entry about leaving a life in San Antonio to return to my home town. Everything in my move was was motivated by love—even leaving everyone behind to pursue a true fulfillment and not the half-life that I preserved so diligently. A New Year’s rendezvous in El Paso affirmed that something powerful had taken over my life and that of my new beloved. Nothing from the past seemed to have any power; it seemed to have been drained of all energy. What had been sustaining my life was my fear of change and of disappointing others—all of whom I loved deeply.

In truth, I could have maintained the situation for decades. My previous relationship would have gone alone with the usual fighting about money, decision-making and lack of passionate interaction. (All of which, I might add, are “energy” issues.) I would still be working in a frenzy to avoid acknowledging the coldness that was slowly seeping through my heart.

One of the things I created as my heart was freezing over was the “Map of Emotions” which shows our emotional states when we’re heartbroken—or healing. I didn’t realize at the time that this piece of art was a colossal billboard trying to get my attention. Ironically, I even added “Disassociation” as a location, not realizing that it directly involved me! I was the mayor of the place.

Sometimes in life we’re the ones in recovery. Other times, we’re sending people to the places of heartbreak.

So, this Valentine’s Day marks my second with my new beloved. We both know it was the spirit of Mary Magdalene who brought us together. And, where one finds her, one always finds Yeshua—for they are one and the same eternal soul. In the two-thousand year old oral tradition of Mary Magdalene’s teachings, the theme of wholeness is pervasive. Wholemindedness. Wholeheartedness. Passion. The frenzy of love. The celebration of life and death and all the mysteries that occur from sunrise to sunrise. Her stories also speak to the integrity that is vital in times of intense, accelerated, change—times like today. For in these last days of the Mayan calendar, every economic system, relationship, nation and personal belief is being shaken to its core to weed out what is based on love and what is not.

What many may not realize is that the story of Yeshua and Mary Magdalene is somewhat young in global culture terms. When I speak of them the context may be mystical Christianity. But, their story is yet another replay of the timeless Isis/Osiris story, which is, itself, based on a more ancient tradition. Goddess has her soul mate; brother god gets jealous. Good god gets betrayed. Bad god slays good god to try and get the goddess. She descends to the underworld of grief, loss and rage…heals and comes back. Re-energized, she searches all over the universe to collect all the missing pieces of her shattered beloved, does magic to reassemble and enliven him. He is resurrected. They re-unite and live happily ever after. Until it’s time for more change.

Then, we’re challenged once more. To preserve the status quo—no matter the cost. Or, to reach out to the unknown, with no guarantees and no safety net. In that moment of weighing the cost, of assessing the possibilities, we live again. For some people and situations are worth preserving, but they cannot remain static for that is to fight against the fundamental pulse of the Universe: that everything constantly change. And, if we are contemplating a change, then, quite possibly, we need it in some form or another. Maybe in so slight a form as a recommitment to love our selves, our beloveds and our lives.

But, in those moments that life brings us: the glance of a stranger, the bracing challenge of having to learn a new skill, the breathlessness of a new love, the spark of reconnecting with a new “old” friend, we dance on the razor’s edge. We challenge the daily sleepwalk that can dull our passion and, for a moment, suspend what is and consider what might be. The willingness to risk vulnerability yields a glimpse of precious eternity. And, that, is the seductive thing.

I wish you a Happy Valentine’s Day with all my heart.